Remembering My Mother

On Monday, August 8, we will gather to remember my mother’s life.  Esther Silvius died, August 4, at the age of 94.  When we gather there in Sugarcreek, Ohio, all will recognize one thing that no one can escape – death!  As the Bible implies in 1 Corinthians 15: 56, death has a painful “sting.” And today, as I write this, the sting hurts.

Esther M. Silvius (1922-2016)

But on Monday, I hope the focus will be upon LIFE—Eternal Life which is a gift to all who put their trust in Christ.  My sister Margie, my brother Dan, and I have lots of memories of our mom—some are joyful; and some, not so much. 

My mother not only gave Margie, Dan, and I our physical LIFE.  She gave us each something else--something she never had–siblings.  Many have said that growing up as an only child can be hard—both as a child and during one’s adult life.  But Dan and I each had the blessing of both a sister and a brother.  Margie was stuck between two brothers!

I am thankful for my mom for three reasons.   First, she gave me life which began when I was conceived, in August, 1946.  That was exactly 7 decades ago this month!

But mom gave me a second gift:  As a boy, she and my dad, Bert Silvius, gave me a love for learning. Mom’s love for wildflowers and trees was contagious and, as a little boy, she led me on my first “field trips.” Sometimes, she had to carry me, especially when we encountered a thick patch of Mayapple (Podophyllum peltatum) in the woods.  I was afraid because I couldn’t see what lie under the thick stands of umbrella-like leaves.  Nevertheless, my growing love of plants resulted in a career in science teaching and research spanning 50 good years.

But the third gift I received from mom and dad is the most valuable and enduring. From the farm, the natural landscape, and science—I learned about the wisdom and provision of God through His “natural revelation.”  But, because mom and dad took us to church faithfully, I also learned about God’s “special revelation”—His Word of truth in the Bible.

As a growing boy, I was anything but a saint.  I “lived” in the Old Testament, tried to keep the 10 Commandments—and failed every day.  I was the Prodigal Son--the one who stayed home and tried to be good--and failed!  Case in point: My mom had a tradition when my birthday rolled around each May.  She would mail in a request to radio station WJER the week before my birthday to have it announced on the air, on May 9.  Then, on my birthday she would call me to the radio around noon to hear my name announced.

One year, when I was romping in the yard with my cousins, mom called me in to listen.
She had made the request, and had looked forward to our tradition.  But this time, I said,
“I’m busy, I don’t want to hear it this year.”
I don’t remember her reaction, but my independent spirit must have hurt her.  When I became a man, I apologized for my insensitivity.  There was a reason for this-- My heart, my values and my character were changing.   As a young man, I came to realize another invitation to “come in and listen.”  It was from God Himself Who had created the world that I had learned to love all around me. 

With my parents, Bert and Esther Silvius (~1963)

He said, “Listen, I am your Creator, and I have prepared an invitation to you at great cost--
The cost of my only Son, Jesus Christ, Who paid the ultimate price by dying on a Roman cross to buy you from the slave market of sin as manifested in your pride, selfishness, and self-righteousness (Romans 5: 8; Ephesians 2: 1-8).

I had hurt my mom by rejecting her invitation to come and listen.  Now, I realized that I had been doing the same thing to God every day, rejecting His even greater invitation.  Jesus invites us all:

Come unto me, all of you who are weary and heavy laden.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me (pull together with Me in my yoke), for I am gentle and humble in heart; And, you will find rest for your souls.  For My yoke is easy, and my burden is light.  – Matthew 11: 28-30.

I’ve borne some heavy yokes in my life because of my stubborn pride and self-righteousness. 
I am prone to take up other heavy yokes, and I need to practice daily the spiritual disciplines of prayer and reading/study of God’s Word in the Bible. 

Today, multitudes of people bear heavy yokes – socially, financially, and medically.  Many have turned to substance abuse to help lighten their load.  In fact, so many are on drugs today that employers are struggling to fill positions with drug-free applicants.
How about you?  Are you bearing a heavy yoke?  Jesus offers us an easier yoke with Him, because He has already born the ugly yoke of a Roman cross.

With Mom (2003)

For God so loved the world that He gave His unique Son, that whoever believes in Him [recognizes their “poverty of spirit” and comes humbly to the Cross] should not perish [be separated from God forever], but have everlasting life. – John 3: 16

I have felt sting in my mother’s deterioration and death.  But, I am thankful for the comfort from friends and from God’s Word that speaks through His Spirit so that we don’t have to grieve as do the rest who have no hope (1 Thessalonians 4: 13).  Comfort and hope are part of the blessed gift of salvation, possible only when we surrender our pride, confess our need of forgiveness of sin, and trust in Christ Who will wrap His arms around us, enveloping us in His Eternal Life.

Faith in God through Christ can take the fear and the sting out of death.  Thank You, God for my mom.  And, thank you mom for pointing me to God.

The Life Report: How Would Yours Read?

I posted my first web log article in Oikonomia, on August 1, 2008, entitled “God: The Greatest “Subject?” My purpose in starting a blog at that time was to focus attention on our Creator God, “The Greatest Subject.” And upon humans and God’s creation as “The Great Objects” of His love, adoration, and ultimately, redemption.  The title, Oikonomia, represents what I believe is “The Great Responsibility” of humans—stewardship, or managing what belongs to God in such a way as to show our reverent love and awe of Him.

Can you think of any other concept from Scripture that is more all-encompassing of human responsibility than stewardship?   Biblical stewardship invites us to adopt the mindset of a servant (not an owner) who uses all of God’s gifts (time, talents, treasures) to honor and glorify Him for the sake of His Son Jesus Christ and His kingdom.   The biblical command in Colossians 3: 17 supports the notion that stewardship encompasses everything we do:

And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by Him.

Did you make a New Year’s resolution in January?  Resolutions are a way of helping us to set goals to better our lives, or the lives of others.  But, how often do we look back and give ourselves a frank evaluation—or, biblically speaking, evaluate our stewardship.  Again, the Bible gives us a good motivation for evaluating our stewardship.  The Apostle Paul, in Romans 14:12 writes, So then each one of us will give an account of himself to God.

In his October 27, 2011 New York Times op-ed column, David Brooks gave some of his readers an “assignment.”  Here it is.

If you are over 70, I’d like to ask for a gift. I’d like you to write a brief report on your life so far, an evaluation of what you did well, of what you did not so well and what you learned along the way. You can write this as a brief essay or divide your life into categories — career, family, faith, community, and self-knowledge — and give yourself a grade in each area.

Several of Brooks’ readers responded by submitting their “Life Reports.”  One was especially meaningful to me as an example of one who is giving serious account of his stewardship.  Brooks published this essay, written in the form of a letter from a father to his two sons, on December 16, 2011.  Here is “The Life Report:  Frank H. Wheeler,” followed by my closing thoughts:
 
The Life Report: Frank H. Wheeler
December 16, 2011 6:52 pm

Dear Todd and Brian,
As my three score and ten years come to a close, it seems a good time to muse a bit about my life. Deep in the mire of active alcoholism in my late 30’s, not many people would have bet I would have passed 40, much less 70. But miracles happen in the strangest of ways and I have been given a life far beyond any I could have dreamed: I am married to the girl of my dreams, coming up on 50 years now. You two, your wives and kids put yourself in my presence, seemingly with pleasure. I have a relationship with, and a healthy dependence upon, a loving God. Both your mom and I have sufficient health, financial resources, mental acuity and interests to embrace and enjoy a robust, diverse life. I had a varied, remunerative, fascinating career in three industries. We seem to have balanced our own interests with responsibilities to our broader societies reasonably well. We, individually and as a couple, have a set of reliable, caring, fun friends different enough to provide spice and perspective, congruent enough to relate. At last count we have visited some 60 countries and seem to be at home in the middle of London or the backwoods of West Virginia. Were we perfect? Nope! Did we make mistakes along the way? Yup! Was it on balance pretty darn good? Absolutely!

Not much of this was predictable to anyone seeing a boy born in modest circumstances in West Virginia in 1940. Higher education was not a norm, a world war was starting, a depression was fresh in everyone’s mind, the average life span for a male in that state was around fifty, people stayed put and guys went to work in the mines, chemical companies or the state road. But my parents, both from humble backgrounds, were different. They had a vision for education, although they had little. They knew how to work hard, live within their means, save for the future, and delay gratification. They knew how to be a neighbor, in the pioneer style, and how to respect family. They had core values and lived by them. They knew God and tried to act as He would want them to act, as best they knew. They educated two boys. They mortgaged their house to found a church. They saved mom’s family farm from foreclosure. Were they perfect? Nope! Did they make mistakes along the way? Yup! Did they provide the foundation for me to build upon? Absolutely!

Now, did I use that foundation? Not for decades. At some point I concluded money and power were the source of happiness. I ran away from the God of my youth. I developed sharp elbows and the ability to “conveniently reinvent facts.” My values, to the extent I had any, were flexible and tailored to any current situations. I ignored obvious and compelling evidence of a genetic predisposition to alcoholism and embraced the magic of Jim Beam. But I did some things right. I worked hard to obtain a useful undergraduate and graduate degree. I had the amazing good sense to marry your mom and she had the poor judgment to stick around. We both shared a sense of adventure that led us enthusiastically to embrace work and other opportunities. I sensed ways to build an asset base by working for fast-growing, small companies and trading short term income for equity. I seemed to be able to do the best job I could at any given time and let the future unfold. We consistently, and to this day, lived below our means. We were able to take prudent risks.

Most fortunate of all, during my alcohol-induced wilderness years, and your early ones, your mom was the steel bands, wrapped in velvet, which held our lives together. As my life spiraled out of control, somehow we survived. I came face to face with the reality of my life, first in jail in Selma, Alabama, and then a moment of clarity in a Nashville coffee shop, Easter Sunday, 1980. Shortly thereafter I prayed, “God, if you are there and you care, I need your help.” God was there, God cared and I got help.

Over time, I did build on the foundation my parents had put in place. I was able to partner more effectively with your mom, expressing my deep and growing love, and joining to mitigate our individual weaknesses and to make the most of our respective strengths. All aspects of life improved and I began to participate in family, community and work in new, enjoyable and largely effective ways. Somehow out of disaster came a confluence of factors that have led to a life I could not have dreamed. I learned not to fear mistakes too much; they were the greatest source of effective learning. I learned to focus my physical, emotional and spiritual energy on things I could change and accept those I could not. I finally discovered that doing the “right” things, in the “right” way and for the “right” motives lead to a general level of contentment even in the face of sadness, uncertainty and legitimate fear. Perfect? Nope! Still much progress to be made? Yup! Largely good and acceptable at 71? Absolutely! Entering the twilight years reasonably at peace? Most of the time!

So, to wrap this up, are there some things I would change? You bet and here are some of them:

1. I would never have used alcohol or other mind-altering substances.
2. I would have become much more open to spirituality much earlier. Nowhere else has “contempt prior to investigation” served me more poorly. I looked at God, institutional churches and believers of all ilks with contempt, anger or amusement. I sought and found, only evidence that supported that view, ignoring evidence to the contrary. And my late blooming spirituality deprived you two of a fuller sense of God in your early years. That I regret deeply.
3. I would have been much more conscious of my footprint on earth. It is amazing how blind I was, and to a large extent still am, to the most sensible of environmental concerns in all aspects of my life. I have not been a good steward of the earth you and your children have inherited.
4. I would have been much more deliberate and thoughtful about how I spent my physical, emotional and spiritual energy, especially in regards my vocations, thinking more precisely about how my decisions affected those around me.
5. I would have been much more open, much sooner, to different people, their perspectives, their beliefs and their life styles. I love the diversity of many of my friends…their variety adds richness, openness, texture and interest to my life. Buddies range from 8^th grade education to GEDs to Ph. D’s to MD’s, from dedicated socialist to a guy to the right of Attila the Hun, from atheist to Hindu to Muslim to Hassidic Jew to Christians of all stripes, from a murderer to a semi-saint, from multi-millionaire to a guy whose net worth is a dog, from about age 25 to me and the list goes on. I treasure the diversity and work very hard to ignore areas of core disagreements, focusing on what I can learn and share. Dialogue not debate.
6. I would have become engaged with the political process, especially at the local level. At least be an informed, engaged voter.

So, how to end this? I look forward to musing about four score years!

Love, Dad
                         *   *    *

My thanks to David Brooks for the idea of writing a “Life Report,”  And, to Frank H. Wheeler for providing a good example that has inspired me to begin writing.  Who knows, perhaps if you and I have opportunity, maybe we can share our “Life Reports.”  I’d be honored to read yours.   And while writing, may God give us the attitude of a humble steward--humility that helps us reflect and write so that our focus may be on what God “The Greatest Subject” has done for us, or in spite of us, “His Greatest Objects.”

Thinking About Harmony and Discord on Martin Luther King Day

Moody Bible Institute Symphonic Band at West Hill Baptist

Yesterday, the eve of Martin Luther King Day, our church, West Hill Baptist Church, hosted the Moody Bible Institute Symphonic Band under the direction of David Gauger II.  We were treated to 45 minutes of classical music from a variety of composers including Bach, Strauss, Haydn, and Wagner.  Early in the performance, the conductor introduced the audience to the unique musical quality of each instrument by having one student musician for each instrument play a few familiar bars.  Although it was a treat to listen as each artist highlighted their particular instrument, the beautiful symphonies we heard later in the evening were only possible because each artist and instrument within the various categories--strings, woodwinds, brass, and percussion—contributed in harmony toward the whole.  Sister Joan Roccasalvo, a member of the Congregation of St. Joseph, Brentwood, NY, explains this relationship between the uniqueness of each individual artist and the beauty of the symphony that is produced when each artist is faithfully committed to the whole score.

Each instrument of the orchestra has its own voice but plays in harmony with the whole. Despite the size or power of an instrumental section, no one group lords it over the others. Each needs the other because no one group incarnates the full meaning of the composition.

As we listened to Brandenburg Concerto No. 3, BWV 1048, by Johann Sebastian Bach, the contribution of each instrument in seemingly perfect harmony touched the depths of my soul as if spiraling down from heaven itself.  I imagined how it might be if the Perfection and Glory of heaven were to descend to Earth and sweep away all of the present disharmony, disunity, and strife. Then, I was reminded that as an expression of Bach’s profession of faith, his aim was to give “Glory to God Alone” as signified by his practice of writing Soli Deo Gloria on his finished manuscripts.  My faith was renewed in God Who has gifted men like Bach and Handel to make it their purpose to bring glory to Him by their beautiful and moving musical compositions.

Steven Spielberg & Liam Neeson on set of "Schindler's List"

After completing the classical music portion of their concert, the Moody Symphonic Band provided another 45 minutes or so of sacred hymns and “contemporary hymns” including “In Christ Alone” by Keith Getty and Stuart Townsend.  However, the performance that spoke to me the most out of this second part of the concert was “Three Pieces from ‘Schindler’s List.”  As I listened, the sad beauty of the music reminded me of having watched the movie, Schindler’s List, the true story of Oskar Schindler who rescued over 1,000 Jews from Adolf Hitler’s gas chambers at Auschwitz.  As I thought of this horrible tragedy, born out of the sinful and deceitful heart of humankind, I wondered how men could take such divergent paths—some like Bach and Hayden who used their time, energy, and talent to bless our ears and hearts with heavens harmonies; whereas, others like Hitler and Stalin used their power to compose the dreadful discordant sound of feet marching to mass executions.

As I listened to the conclusion of “Three Pieces from ‘Schindler’s List,” I remembered the many parallels between the Nazi holocaust and the current “American holocaust” which has taken the lives of over 57 million unborn human beings since the Roe vs. Wade Supreme Court ruling in 1973.  Truly, the abortion of these innocent lives is one of the greatest tragedies of human history.  However, I was encouraged by an experience I had had earlier on this Lord’s Day. 

A few hours earlier I had honored an earlier invitation of the Wayne-Holmes Right to Life (WHRTL) Chapter to attend an afternoon worship service in celebration of God’s gift of life as part of their annual Sanctity of Human Life Sunday program.  I was encouraged to hear Ohio Right to Life Trustee, Scott Wiggham relate the progress of the Pro-Life Movement in Ohio, and then to join with these folks in praying.   We prayed (in part) as follows:

Lord, have mercy!  We ask You, God, to hold these little ones in your arms.  Bless and protect them.  May they know love and contentment in Your presence.  Bless mothers who are with child; may they never resort to abortion.  Forgive those who have had, performed, or encouraged abortions.  Turn their hearts away from sin and help them to see the sanctity of ALL life that is created in your image.

Alone this morning, I reflected once again on the heavenly harmonies that were provided by the Moody Symphonic Band yesterday evening, and the harmony of Christian brothers and sisters who gathered yesterday afternoon to praise our Creator for the gift of life.  As has been my habit, I read the Psalm appointed for today, January 19, which was Psalm 139.  In it, David reflects on God’s omniscience, even to the point of knowing all about David while he was as yet unborn:

My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them.  – Psalm  139: 15-16

My frame was not hidden from You, God

What an amazing revelation from Scripture: God sees us and knows us as a person even before we are fully formed by the expression of genes we obtained from our parents at conception.  Biology reveals to us what David didn’t know, but God knew because He designed the whole process; namely, soon after conception and as the tiny embryo of a new generation is implanted in the uterine lining, he or she produces and sends into the mother’s bloodstream a message in the form of a hormone (Chorionic Gonadotropin, or CG). 

The hormone, CG, is the tiny embryo’s way of making his or her first “cry” to mom, saying, “Mother, I am here.  I hope you won’t have your monthly period.  Instead, I want you to protect and nourish me while God’s wonderful plan works in harmony between us like a symphony to unfold in proper order each of my bodily systems.  Soon, my nervous system, and before a month is passed, then my heart will be beating.  Before you know it, you will feel me moving inside of you and I will begin to hear your voice and become acquainted with your movements.”

Do you see the Earth-shattering contrast between the harmony of God’s creation and the discord introduced by the fall of man in the Garden and the subsequent rebellion, pride, and violent acts?  The harmony, or Shalom, of God’s creation includes the development of a human life beginning at conception and leading through a seamless path forward toward birth like a symphony performed without flaw by an orchestra.  Yet, the sinful discord of abortion continues to interrupt this harmony in all too many instances like a meteor blast into an auditorium during symphony orchestra performance.

Marchers in Support of Sanctity of Human Life

Many of us deeply regret the Nazi holocaust while others find it hard to believe it could have even come about in a civilized world.  Likewise, many of us regret the American holocaust, and many are active in bringing it to an end.  But I wonder how many human tragedies like this it will take before we are humbled before God to realize that there is no hope for us without confession of our sins and surrendering to God’s forgiveness through the sacrifice of His sinless Son, Jesus Christ.  We have absolutely no reason to trust human reason apart from the searching light of God’s Word.  As Psalm 139, quoted above ends, David realizes his need for God to search his heart, try his thoughts, and lead him in the everlasting way.

M.L. King Jr. & niece, Alveda King, civil & Pro-Life leader

After meditating on Psalm 139 this morning, we were blessed to awaken our granddaughters Kiara Maetta and Della Rose who had spent the night in our home because their schools were closed to observe Martin Luther King Day.  After breakfast, Kiara and I watched a YouTube video recording of Dr. King’s “I Have a Dream Speech.”  Once again, I was reminded of the contrast between the symphonic harmony and the discordant outcomes from sinful mankind.  Through His grace and mercy, God had provided a man with a vision to see past the discord of hate and racial discrimination to a day when God’s love and harmony would characterize life in America:

With this faith, we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith, we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith, we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.  – Martin Luther King, Jr.  (1963)

Prayer:   Father in Heaven, thank you for Your encouragement through the heavenly harmonies of a symphonic band and the blessed fellowship of fellow Christians praying on Sanctity of Life Sunday; and then today, to reflect on the efforts of Dr. King and the peaceful protests He led on behalf of human rights which contributed much to the progress in reconciliation among racial groups in America.  Remind me continually of my own double-mindedness.  You’ve made me walk with You in peace and to enjoy harmony all around me; but, my heart is deceitful and tends to promote discord.   Remind me of my constant need of repentance from sin and refilling with your Holy Spirit.  And would you also bring revival to America, a nation so capable of great accomplishments for good; but, like me, so prone to deception and discord.  Renew within me a commitment to do my part in sharing the Gospel of repentance, reconciliation and revival in an America—for her only hope lies in whether individuals and families will respond to Your call through your people full of the love of Christ and His Holy Spirit—the very Source of truth, justice, mercy—and harmony.   Amen.